I got an email from Audible about a new book--Working With You Is Killing Me: Freeing Yourself from Emotional Traps at Work by Katherine Crowley and Kathi Elster. The blurb says, among other things,

"If you find yourself getting fed up and frustrated with a colleague whose incompetence is driving you crazy, a boss who gets angry when you're not a mind reader....chances are you're caught in an emotional trap in the workplace. Quit complaining and do something! Freeing yourself is easier than you think, and you don't have to quit or fire anyone to do it. The solution is simple: Take control of your own response."

While I haven't listened to this book and probably won't, I already have a response: If your manager is driving you crazy, just quit! Tempering your reactions means 1) you're supposed to say it's no one's fault if work is hell (wrong) and 2) you wind up spending a massive amount of energy controlling your responses (which may be justified) instead of doing anything constructive.

At my current job I spend energy on prepping for meetings, preparing planning and tracking documents, running meetings, etc. I don't have to spend any time figuring out how not to react badly to bitter, sarcastic managers. Life is good.